Cracked.com levels its intrepid logic and insightful analysis at zombies again in this article identifying six things that never make sense in zombie movies.
1. What happens after all the people are eaten?
2. Could zombieism have any chance of being cured?
3. Where does the food go after they eat it?
4. How do they know anything?
5. Why do they want to eat humans, which are harder and more dangerous to hunt?
6. Why don’t zombies ever finish their meal?
To which I would add:
7. If the zombies are slow, how do they take over so fast?
8. Why are people working minimum wage jobs right up until they get bitten? (You so often see people wearing retail name tags and uniforms.)
9. If people get eaten, why do they so often stand up bloodied but intact?
10. Why do people go hunting zombies in dark buildings when they could simply yell, “It’s dinner time!”
11. How did these people get so good at shooting zombies in the head at 50 feet with pistols?
12. Why are some people bitten, and then a couple of hours later they’re rotting away as if they’d been left out in the sun for a week?
Of course, the answer is always: “It’s just a movie.”
Check it out here.
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